Saturday, August 30, 2008

About the Name

This is my blog for my knitting, crocheting, and anything else that might happen to come up. I hope to keep track of my family events, my knitting and crocheting projects with pictures and stories. Here's where I came up with the name. My daughter Gillian was born 91/2 years ago. She only lived 8 days. She had to be delivered at 27 weeks gestation in order to save my life due to a pregnancy complication called Hellp syndrome. She weighed 1lb 7.14 oz. After she was born she spent her short life in the NICU. A charity group called Touching Little Lives provided her with a quilt for her isolette, a blanket to be wrapped in, and sadly a burial layette. As I was grieving I promised myself I would learn how to sew, crochet and/or knit so that I could provide support to some other mother that was in a similar situation. I was going to start a foundation, a charity, etc...however, there was no need to reinvent the wheel. Touching Little Lives is a wonderful charity and I became a very active member. During that grieving process and my future pregnancy with my youngest son (I was on bedrest for 15 weeks) I taught myself how to sew and then crochet. I never really took to sewing. I got the idea somewhere along the way that I was going to make 11,000 blankets and/or burial layettes (that is approximately 1 blanket for each minute that Gillian was alive) and donate them to TLL or to the hospital that cared for Gillian. You may not realize this, but 11,000 blankets is a lot. Yes, I counted exactly how many minutes she was alive. I counted how many minutes I was with her. I counted how many minutes I was away from her. When your daughter is delivered to save your life there is a lot of guilt... Anyway, 11,000 seemed too daunting and somehow over the years I settled on 3,000, which I think I figured out is the number of minutes that I actually spent touching her. Because she was in a isolette, and because of the tubes, there was a limit on the amount that we could spend holding and touching her. (most often I put my hand on top of her head like in the picture) I doubt I will ever complete all of them. Who knows maybe someday someone else will read this and make a donation to TLL or to the NICU in Gillian's memory, but I'm working on it and that I think is the important part because somewhere there are 114 families (at this point) who have had babies in the NICU that hopefully got some comfort from something that I made.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I love you. B.